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March 4-6, 2005

At The Top - Yahoo! The weekend is almost here and it's time to have some fun as we roll out this week's Friday Icon Edition! There's quite the selection of pixel pleasure ability accompanied by Community News and Bananas too. So rather than listen to me aimlessly ramble my way through this introduction, howz about we just get right down to the fun and put the work week's blahs behind us? Okay with you? I thought so. Let's dooo it!

Pro Icons for Pro Developers - Miloszwl.com

New GOO!

New Icons - Are ya ready to be dazzled? Good! Hang on to your eyeballs as we have a fantabulous round of 3 New Icon Sets that are sure to make your GUI view shine! And since pixel view is simply sensational, let's get right down to it!

Yellow Icon - Whoa doggies! The latest cast of characters by Yellow Icon's Everaldo "Dr. Feelgood" Coelho makes the most of virtually every mood with his latest pixel package appropriately titled Emoticons. Whether in a melancholy mood, or just feeling alienated, you'll find just the right emotion for motion!

 

i...mac@dam - When looking for taste with an eye candy smile, where do you go? i...mac@dam, of course! And as Isabelle Laffy releases her latest flavor in icons to savor, you will find that CandyDisc will most certainly satisfy your taste buds as well as provide for a pixel pile of phantasmagoria...Mmm mmm good!

 

elpincho Designs - Wow, wow, WOW! Did I happened to say wow? Well, your eyes are certain to see the wow sensation once you get a look at elpincho Designs' collection of icons titled iHdr. Perhaps one of his finest creations to date, elpincho offers a possible view for the "new" to come in the Mac world of hardware. Enjoy!

Thanks Department --

Everaldo, Isabelle, and elpincho...

There's never enough of your talent to go around...

Keep it a comin'!

THANK YOU!

Wanna share your work with the world?

Send Us Your Icons!

Community News

Stockicons.com - Great GUI news just in from Stockicons.com! Building on the success of the unique "Porcelain" series, the folks from the Factory are pleased to announce two new add-on sets for the Porcelain stock icon series. Porcelain: Database Add-On and Porcelain: Multimedia. The first is an extension of the original stock icon set and includes icons covering such specialized concepts as tables, scripts, records, and many others. The second, a set of add-ons that extends the original collection into the audio & visual realm with icons covering concepts such as mixing, effects, video and more. Each set is available today for $179.00 USD, and details for both can be grabbed by making a hop, skip, and jump to Stockicons.com!

Bananas

New Definitions Part II

Eclipse i-klips': what an English barber does for a living.

Eyedropper i'-drop-ur: a clumsy ophthalmologist.

Heroes hee'-rhos: what a guy in a boat does.

Left Bank left' bangk': what the robber did when his bag was full of loot.

Misty mis'-tee: How golfers create divots.

Paradox par'-u-doks: two physicians.

Parasites par'-uh-sites: what you see from the top of the Eiffel Tower.

No More, No More!

No more about Elvis, OK? Thankyouverymuch.

Mental Institution

Jon and Dan were in a mental institution. This place had an annual contest, picking two of the best patients and giving them two questions. If they answered correctly, they were deemed cured and free to go.

Jon was called into the doctor's office first and asked if he understood that he'd be free if he answered the questions correctly. The doctor said, "Jon, what would happen if I poked out one of your eyes?"

Jon said, "I'd be half blind."

"That's correct. What would happen if I poked out both your eyes?"

"I'd be completely blind." The doctor stood up, shook his hand, and told him he was free.

On Jon's way out, as the doctor filled out the paperwork, Jon mentioned the questions to Dan. He told him what questions would be asked and the answers. Dan was called in. The doctor went through the formalities and asked, "What would happen if I cut off one of your ears?"

Dan, remembering what Jon had said, said, "I'd be half blind."

The doctor looked a little puzzled, but went on. "What would happen if I cut off both your ears?"

"I'd be completely blind."

"Dan, how can you explain that you'd be blind?" asked the doctor.

"Well," replied Dan, "my hat would fall over my eyes."

Ghost Arrest

Q: Why was the ghost arrested?

A: Because it had no haunting license!!

March 3, 2005

Monkie News | Network News

Monkie News

Tomorrow: New Icons - Okay...Now that we've made it passed the dumps and the bumps and the humps, it's time we look forward to one last thump as we're nearing the week's end and a new round of pixel pumps! Say what?!! Simply put, there's a whole new round of fun as we're readying things up for your Friday Icon Edition. That wasn't so hard, or was it? Either way, be sure to swing back by on Friday to ye ol' Monkie Parlour for a new batch of News, GOO, and Fun!

Network News

the WebWorld - BeanHead

XServe At Your Service - Mac has made a magnificent name for itself in the world of music and the arts. That is not what will get it to stay in business, however. The business world that is. Apple may begin dominating the business world through its XServe, which processes and delivers data at a prime rate. Though PCs still pop up all over company desks, Apple is offering much more than meets the eye behind the scenes. Because of the prominent performance of XServe, Apple can get in businesses back door, and thus stay in business. So many ways to comment on this, but I'll just keep my trap shut! - from Computerworld

Remembering Mac Man - The original inventor of the Mac computer has passed on to that big computer room in the sky. Jef Raskin, the man with the vision for the Mac, had the first dream of the dream machine, factoring the philosophy that computing should be affordable and easy. He initiated the invention of what eventually became the Macintosh, but was not actually with Apple by the time the Mac went to market. Strangely enough, he died of a form of pancreatic cancer, a form of which Steve Jobs, Apple CEO, had surgery for recently. - from Wired

Mr. Gates Turns Sir Gates - Billionaire Bill Gates, though not British, has been officially knighted at the Buckingham Palace in London. Now a Knight Commander of the computer business, the British Foreign Secretary dubbed Gates an important business man whose operating system, Microsoft, has had a profound impact on the British economy. Some would jest, however, that Gates has boosted the British economy more so through the employment of techs to fix viruses than anything else. For cryin' out loud, give me a break!!! - from MacObserver

March 2, 2005

Desktops | Community News | Bananas

At The Top - Wassup, Monkie mates?! Tired of the old desktop place mats staring you in the face? Then you've come to the right locale at this moment in space...It's time to make a major bump in the hump of the mid-week blues with your weekly Wednesday Desktop Edition! There's a load of locality in pixels - no calories! And a smidgen of News and Bananas to boot. So now that we have the skinny, let's quit piddley pokin' around and have some good old fashioned fun!

New GOO!

New Desktops - Look out eyeballs, 'cuz here we come! There are 4 New Desktops for your smooth viewing fun. And with that little blurb now out of the way, let's get to the biz...Oh wait! Let's just play!

Logos - To kick off this pixel show, we thought we would begin by rolling out a barrel of Monkie style fun with a look at one of Francisco Bennett's coconut flavored creations with MacMonkies v2! After the first MacMonkies debut from XÅERO Graphics Design Studio, many requested a more colorful version. They delivered this great selection, also found in the Fun Department. And we humbly add our thanks!

Are you still waiting for the release of Tiger and for its arrival at your door? Then we have great news as we introduce 10.4! This furry little fellow coming from the GUI galleries of elpincho Designs will pacify your pre-release anticipations with the stripes of a winning design. You might even find yourself trying to pet your monitor!

 

Desktops - Always crafting quality into every creation he conceives, Bob Wiley adds a pearly internal layer of certain mollusk shells to come up with Mother of Pearl. Though Bob admits he doesn't really know where he "came up with these things," you're certain to find a place right on your desktop face to add a timeless sense of awe to your computer view!

Your eyes are getting heavy. Your toes are becoming numb. You are about to nod off...You are Getting Sleepy! And so is the title of the latest twist of hypnotic GOO from the ever talented hands of Neil Roberts...Oh yeah! Though we don't really think this piece will put you to sleep, we do feel you'll find it easily amongst your favorites. Enjoy!

 

Thanks Department --

Francisco, elpincho, Bob, and Neil...

It's a privilege and an honor to display your work!

THANK YOU!

Have a piece you want to display?

Check out our Submissions guidelines and then send it in!

Community News

The Iconfactory - BIFF! BANG!! POW!!!! If you're a fan of the Dark Knight -- AKA Batman -- then you'll be pleased to see the latest release from The Iconfactory! Resident pixel pusher Talos Tsui has just let loose his latest freeware icon collection titled Batmobiles Vol.1. This cool new set is a small visual history of the Dark Knight's favorite rides from the classic days of DC comics to the upcoming "Batman Begins" coming from Warner Brothers in June. The Iconfactory invites you to swing into the Showroom and download this cool collection as either standard icons or as a handy Pixadex iContainer that fits easily into any standard utility belt! Go get 'em!

Bananas

Just Plain Nutz!

Do You Know Me?

A small-town prosecuting attorney called his first witness to the stand in a trial -- a grandmotherly, elderly woman. He approached her and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know me?"

She responded, "Why, yes, I do know you Mr. Williams. I've known you since you were a young boy. And frankly, you've been a big disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your wife, you manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you're a rising big shot when you haven't the brains to realize you never will amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you."

The lawyer was stunned. Not knowing what else to do he pointed across the room and asked, "Mrs. Williams, do you know the defense attorney?"

She again replied, "Why, yes I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was a youngster, too. I used to baby sit him for his parents. And he, too, has been a real disappointment to me. He's lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem. The man can't build a normal relationship with anyone and his law practice is one of the shoddiest in the entire state. Yes, I know him."

At this point, the judge rapped the courtroom to silence and called both counselors to the bench. In a very quiet voice, he said with menace, "If either of you asks her if she knows me, you'll be jailed for contempt!"

Adam, Eve, and God Makes Three

"God," said Adam, "Why did you make Eve so beautiful?"

"So you would love her."

"But why did you make her so dumb?"

"So she would love you."

New Definitions Part I

Arbitrator ar'-bi-tray-ter: A cook that leaves Arby's to work at McDonald's.

Avoidable uh-voy'-duh-buhl: What a bullfighter tries to do.

Baloney buh-lo'-nee: Where some hemlines fall.

Bernadette burn'-a-det: The act of torching a mortgage.

Burglarize bur'-gler-ize: What a crook sees with.

Control kon-trol': A short, ugly inmate.

Counterfeiters kown-ter-fit-ers: Workers who put together kitchen cabinets.

Mistaken Identity

A drunk guy is walking down the street. He sees this nun, runs up and knocks her over. He says, "You don't feel so tough now, do you, Batman!?"

March 1, 2005

Monkie News | Network New

Monkie News

Tomorrow: New Desktops - Well, well, well! We've made it past the Monday grumpy's and are headed toward the Wednesday humpy's as we're smack dab in the middle with the first day of March! And that means Spring is one day closer. But better yet, it means your Wednesday Desktop Edition is but one day away. Hot diggity doggities! So whilst we're preppin' up the upcoming brew of new GOO, let's hand the mic over to the Bean and get a look at some of the most recent Network News!

Network News

the WebWorld - BeanHead

Recent iPods Reinforce Apple - Far from enjoying its success by simply sitting around basking in the sun, Apple stays on the move and doesn't miss a beat. Instead of relishing in the remarkable returns of its iPod, the company is still releasing upgraded versions of iPod mini and iPod photo, securing its success for the future. Apple already has huge success due to the companionship of iTunes and the iPod, but continuing to offer fresh, new products in the music market should help to keep it on the top. - from GarterG2

Napster Ad Doesn't Add Up - Napster has a new campaign commenting that consumers should "Do the Math" to find that Napster tunes turn out to be cheaper than iTunes. The ad seeks to discourage the public from purchasing the iPod, but it doesn't add up when the details are divulged. For example, people who purchase from iTunes actually own the songs, where Napster simply offers a subscription. Napster also does not take into account that iPod purchasers can even transfer music off the CDs they already own. - from MacNewsWorld

Soccer Ball Meets The Goal - Technology is taking the soccer game one step further than the instant replay. A microchip has been developed to be donned by a soccer ball which will help determine whether soccer players really meet their goal. The sensored chip is inserted in the soccer ball and sounds an alarm on a referees wrist device every time the ball crosses the goal line. The soccer ball, dubbed the microchip ball, was made by Adidas and is in experimentation in multiple countries. - from Excite

February 28, 2005

Community News | Monkie News | Monkie Business | Bananas

At The Top - Get on your feet and get ready to March! It's the last day of February and we're all out of starch. So we can't fix your britches. Besides, that just itches. But we can look for Spring when all the Monkie birds sing. Though today is still cold as it's Monday with mold, we can start the week right and fight the good fight. Wipe the snarl off your face and open your eyes. This day shall soon pass, 'cuz you know how time flies! And with News and Bananas and a new Featured Link, your blues will be gone in all but a blink. Now that I've said my obligatory ramble, let's get right down to it. Come folks! Let's scramble!

Community News

Live Pencil - Feelin' lucky? Well you ought to as St. Patty's day is just around the corner and as Live Pencil has just added a whole new slew of lucky charms. Let's have a look:

• EMOTICONS - St. Patrick is coming!!!
• EMOTICONS - More funny St. Patrick emoticons.
• EMOTICONS  - Happy Saint Patrick's day.
• 3 new WALLPAPERS  - March calendar and more.

With all of the green, your collection will be the envy of the neighborhood. So swing by Live Pencil and check, check, check 'em out!

Monkie News

Featured Link - What do we have here?! After several moons snoozing away, The Featured Link returns with the amazing creations of iAlphan. You've certainly seen the works of Alphan Gunaydin here in the Monkie Gallery, but we feel a trip to his alterative spot in reality would make for a great choice. So have a look at our take found in the left hand column, and then click over to our Links Page and check it out!

Monkie Business

Odds and Ends

Cold Is Cold - Minus 40 degrees Celsius is exactly minus 40 degrees Fahrenheit. This is the only temperature for which the readings on both scales are equal.

Fatal Flying: Buckle Up! - When airplanes were still a novel invention, seat belts for pilots were installed only after the consequence of their absence was observed to be fatal – several pilots fell to their deaths while flying upside down.

Smart Sense - What do Harry Anderson, Cindy Crawford, and (Weird) Al Yankovic have in common? They were all valedictorians.

- Groucho Marx

Patience - Patience with others is Love, Patience with self is Hope, Patience with God is Faith.

- Adel Bestavros

Concrete Facts - Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one.

- Albert Einstein

Bananas

Just Plain Nutz!

Unleaded, Please

A woman at a gas station noticed a spaceship landing in front of her. An alien stepped out of the spaceship and started to pump gas into it. The woman noticed the letters "U.F.O." printed on the side of the ship.

She turned to the alien and asked "Does U.F.O. stand for Unidentified Flying Object?"

The alien answered, "No, it stands for Unleaded Fuel Only!"

The Toothbrush And The Toilet Paper

One day a miserable toothbrush sits down and says, ''Sometimes I feel I have the worst job in the world.'' Then the toilet paper yells, "Think again buddy!"

Do It Yourself

When the office printer's type began to grow faint, the office manager called a local repair shop where a friendly man informed him that the printer probably needed only to
be cleaned. Because the store charged $50 for such cleanings, he said, the manager might try reading the printer's manual
and doing the job himself.

Pleasantly surprised by his candor, the office manager asked, "Does your boss know that you discourage business?"

"Actually it's my boss's idea," the employee replied. "We usually make more money on repairs if we let people try to fix things themselves first."

Sorry, Wrong Number

One morning the phone rang at 3:00 a.m. in Jeff's house. He picked up the phone and a woman asked, "Is this 555-1111?"

"No, this is 555-1112." Jeff replied.

"Oh, I'm so sorry for disturbing you." The woman said.

"That's alright," Jeff said. "I had to get up to answer the phone anyway."