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February 11-13, 2005

Monkie In Short - Good grief, Charlie Brown!! Feels like someone grabbed hold of the elastic from around me boxers and yanked 'em up around my neck! "What's this?" you ask. Let's just say that when it rains, the ol' flood gates open and I find myself floating past Gilligan's Island. As a result of the many things that need my immediate attention, we will break from our usual Friday Icon Edition and simply have an abbreviated stint: Monkie In Short. There is some News and Bananas so you don't have to leave empty handed.

When will we return to normal? Since I am far from normal, that's a tough question. But as far as updates, we hope to be right back on target with a special treat for all of you love monkies come this Monday, February 14th. No promises, but I'll give 'er the old college try. Smell me later!

On The Net

A Better Finder Attributes 3.7 - In from PUBLICSPACE.NET is news of their latest software release: A Better Finder Attributes 3.7. This cool Mac betterment tool is a contextual menu plugin that allows users to change the file date and other attributes of Mac OS X files. The new release introduces a new swizzle triangle user interface and makes significant internal changes. Want the full scoop on all the latest? Head over to PUBLICSPACE.NET get all the details about A Better Finder Attributes today!

Bananas

Just Plain Nutz!

Anglicized Chinese Part II

It's very dark in here - Wai So Dim?

I thought you were on a diet - Wai Yu Mun Ching?

This is a tow away zone - No Pah King

Our meeting is scheduled for next week - Wai Yu Kum Nao?

Staying out of sight - Lei Ying Lo

He's cleaning his automobile - Wa Shing Ka

Your body odor is offensive - Yu Stin Ki Pu

Bad Day

You know it's going to be a bad day when your teenager knocks on your bedroom door first thing in the morning and says, "Today is Nerd Day at school, Dad. Can I borrow some of your clothes?"

Pierced Ears

The students in my third grade class were bombarding me with questions about my newly pierced ears.

"Does the hole go all the way through?"

"Yes."

"Did it hurt?"

"Just a little."

"Did they stick a needle through your ears?"

"No, they used a special gun."

Silence followed, and then one solemn voice called out, "How far away did they stand?"

February 9-10, 2005

Desktops | Community News | Bananas

At The Top - Okie dokie, folkies! We've got a couple of things to tend to, so I will try to keep me meandering mouth from wandering around too much! First up in the alley of fun in the sun is your ever and always eye appealing Wednesday Desktop Edition. Down yonder a ways on the page you'll find some fine desktop designs followed by amenities in the areas of Community News and Bananas too.

Second on the plate is to announce a very brief break from our regularly scheduled events on Thursday, February 10th. The purpose for slippin' out the back Jack is to open up an extra bit of time to work on the mystery project tentatively schedule for a February 14 release. So, with all of that said (and I didn't even foam at the mouth too much), let's get on with the GOO and check out the latest in GUI goodies!

New GOO!

New Desktops - Hoorah! It's once again that time to dance in delight as there are 5 New Desktops available in the Gallery for this week's Desktop Edition! All you have to do is tuck in your napkin, grab your eatin' utensils, and get ready to fill your appetite with fine design on this fun filled flight!

Desktops - A simple flick of the switch will add light to any room in your own personal stash of GUI cache. But Dave Hornsby has another trick up his sleeve as he does wonders to the simple design found in Trick Of The Light 1. Moving a mix of color and flash in an angular direction, this fine feat for the eyes will be a "fave" in your desktop collections!

 

3-D Rendered - Darkness sets in a land of the lost as we view the latest jaw-droppin' awe from Juergen Eilts of ShiftedReality. In a place where no person would want to step foot, Unholy highlights this un-heavenly horizon with the use of Juergen's amazing imagination and Terragen 0.919 combined with Photoshop. Spooky!

Another fine pic that seems to come from the depths of doom comes to your desktop doorway via the talents of Nate Dashiki. Making use of some wrangled and mangled "wires" a la Bryce, Wire Mesh features a scene of never land likeness with a scourge of incandescence that will melt any ice. Handle with care!

 

Logos - Always adding a new view to the world of Apple design, the dedication and creativity of Francisco Bennett from XÅERO Graphics Design Studio is ever apparent in Mac Billboards - Apple. The sleek semblance of Apple's ever popular logo is kept in the form of purity and perfection, and all dressed up in black - just like Mr. Steve jobs would have it!

 

Etc... - By golly, the ol' Beaner has done it again! MacMonkies very own Tina "BeanHead" Spicer has offered yet another pic from the feline family with a look at Tigger, Toenails and Wobbles' sweet little sister BC. Though one of four siblings in a family of five, she has never to date been featured on these pages...SORRY BC! But now she warms up next to a space heater as she debuts in the spotlight with an artistic touch courtesy of some Photoshop filters. Enjoy!

Thanks Department --

Juergen, Dave, Francisco, Nate, and Tina...

There's never enough of your great GUI goodness to go around!

Keep up the FANTASTIC work!

THANK YOU!

Have a piece you want to display?

Check out our Submissions guidelines and then send it in!

Community News

The Iconfactory - Ready for an all new release of GUI freshness from the fab folks at The Iconfactory? Then you got it! Litho System is a full system replacement set by resident artist Anthony Piraino that features bright colors and an old, weathered style. The icon set is certain bring a fun and unique look to your system. If you're looking for nothing but the best in pixel design, head on over to the The Iconfactory and check it out the latest fun for the Mac, PC or as a helpful CandyBar iContainer!

Bananas

Just Plain Nutz!

That's not right - Sum Ting Wong

Are you harboring a fugitive? - Hu Yu Hai Ding?

See me ASAP - Kum Hia Nao

Stupid Man - Dum Gai

Small Horse - Tai Ni Po Ni

Did you go to the beach? - Wai Yu So Tan?

I bumped into a coffee table - Ai Bang Mai Ni

I think you need a face lift - Chin Tu Fat

Undertaker's Rule The Roost

What did one undertaker say to the other?

Pass me another cold one!

Ways The Bible Would Be Different

Ways the Bible would be different if written by college students:

1. Last Supper would have been eaten the next morning - cold.

2. The Ten Commandments are actually only five, double-spaced, and written in a large font.

3. New edition every two years in order to limit reselling.

4. Forbidden fruit would have been eaten because it wasn't cafeteria food.

5. Paul's letter to the Romans becomes Paul's e-mail to abuse@romans.gov.

6. Reason Cain killed Abel: They were roommates.

7. The place where the end of the world occurs: Finals, not Armageddon.

8. Out go the mules, in come the mountain bikes.

9. Reason why Moses and followers walked in desert for 40 years: They didn't want to ask directions and look like freshmen.

10. Instead of God creating the world in six days and resting on the seventh, He would have put it off until the night before it was due and then pulled an all-nighter.

Bully For You

Why did the bully go to beauty school?

To tease hair!

February 8, 2005

Monkie News | Network News

Monkie News

Coming Up! - In what looks to be a busy week, we will be preparing some goodies that should be quite the treat! Come tomorrow will be our ready steady round of eye candy wonders as the griddle is hot with new numbers for your Wednesday Desktop Edition. And if all goes well (please please please), we'll have a very special release for Monday, February 14th. As far as the aforementioned, we can't let too many of the Monkies outta the bag. But keep your eyes and ears peeled and we'll keep you up to speed on all of the latest. That said, let's get on with the News!

Network News

the WebWorld - BeanHead

Software Makes Mac Mini - Apple overcame two major milestones into the PC community with its Mac mini - design and affordability. The software that is included with Mac mini, however is what makes the mini monumental. With a secure operating system in place to run programs seamlessly, minis selling point is the users ability to experience the cream of the Apple crop. iPhoto, iMovie and Garageband are among the spectacular software included that make Mac mini magnificent. - from BusinessWeek and Apple

iPod Cool Social Tool - iPod is turning out to be more than meets the eye. The key to cool is experienced, actually, as eyes meet the iPod. As soon as people eye the iPod owner and view those unmistakable white earphones they immediately think cool. Thus the iPod opens up a palette of potential relationships with its rainbow of coolness adding color to peoples personal lives. A great digital music gadget, iPod opens ears to the music world and also opens the door to all the people of the world. - from WebProNews

Why Put Up With Windows? - While the world wakes up to its work-a-day Windows world watching its PCs lack performance and get eaten alive by bugs, one can't help but question why. How is it that people continue to put up with poor PC experiences when the Mac option is available? In all reality, it seems reasonable that a Mac revolution should be going on. Workers everywhere should relieve their stress by protesting against PCs and making it a Mac world. Maybe one day the public will get fed up enough to face Microsoft head on. - from MacMinute

February 7, 2005

Monkie Business | Bananas

At The Top - Sometimes you feel like a nut, sometimes you don't...Me thinks this is one of those that fits into the latter rather than the former. But then again, one can always grab a ladder to grab a coconut or three. And the view from the top of the tree? Well, there's still not a lot to see. Still kinda slow as a fatter-of-mact. So we'll tip toe past the two lips with a meaningless act. Except to say without saying: Yes it's true! There's Monkie Business and Bananas up next just for you. Lassen Sie uns anfangen!

Monkie Business

Odds and Ends

Do Drink The Water! - If the fresh water of the earth (only 1.6 percent of the water on the planet) was divided equally among all the people on earth, each one would get 40 million gallons.

Help! My Feet Are Stuck In My Mouth! - In the early 1960's, opinionist William F. Buckley, Jr. wrote the following about the Fab Four: The Beatles are not merely awful, I would consider it sacrilegious to say anything less than that they are godawful...They are so unbelievably horrible, so appallingly unmusical, so dogmatically insensitive to the magic of the art, that they qualify as crowned heads of anti-music."

Meteor Millions - The current demand for meteorites is so great that meteor hunters can command $1,000 per pound from eager buyers. Some meteor hunters have become millionaires from the sales of their findings.

- B. Wiles

Diplomacy - A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's birthday but never remembers her age.

- Robert Frost

Victory And Defeat - Many a man has finally succeeded only because he has failed after repeated efforts. If he had never met defeat he would never have known any great victory.

- Orison Swett Marden

Bananas

Just Plain Nutz!

Shut-up and Trouble

In a small town in California there lived two boys, Shut-up and Trouble. These boys were friends, but every once-in-awhile they would get into a fight. One time after they had both just gotten ice-cream, Trouble's ice-cream fell. Trouble then stole Shut-up's ice-cream and ran away. Shut-up ran after Trouble but eventually lost him, sat on a curb, and started to cry.

A police officer pulled up and asked, "What's your name?"

"Shut-up."

The officer got angry and asked the same question again and got the same reply. Finally, he asked the same question and got the same reply and then said, "Boy, are you looking for Trouble?"

And Shut-up said, "Yeah, that fool stole my ice-cream!"

Antenna And The TV

What did the antenna say to the TV?

"Without me, you'd be snowed in."

Misuse Of The System

Three men heard rumors of a mountaintop where God came down to solve people's problems. So they all went to the mountain.

The first man was deaf and God asked him, "Can I help you, son?" The man started signing in sign language that he would be so happy if only he could hear. So God touched the man and suddenly he could hear.

God then asked the second man, who was blind, "What can I do for you, my son?"

The second man said, "Oh God, if I could only see I would be so happy." So God touched him and the man was able to see.

Meanwhile, the third man was sitting in his wheelchair with his mouth wide open in amazement. God looked at the man and asked him what he wanted.

The man stepped back and yelled, "Don't lay one finger on me, God, I am on total disability!"

Silly Boy

A little kid walks into a movie theater one day. At the counter, he buys one ticket and then goes in. All of a sudden, he comes back out and buys another one. The man at the counter asks, "Why do you want another one?"

The kid replies, "Because that man over there ripped the other one!"